The new 5 second rule

The new 5 second rule

The new 5 second rule
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Answer these questions. Then listen to Bella share her views. Report back what you heard.

How long, do you think, it takes to make a first impression?

Well, I used to think it took a while to make a first impression, like maybe a few minutes of talking to someone. But after watching Quita Christonson’s talk about the ‘NEW 5 SECOND RULE’ and the STOP method – ‘See the Other Person’, I’ve changed my mind. Now, I believe it actually takes just a few seconds! It’s pretty amazing and a bit scary, right?

I remember this one time, I met someone and instantly thought they were super serious and kinda strict. But after chatting for a bit, I found out they were actually really funny and laid-back. It was a real eye-opener for me. It showed me how quick we are to judge and how often we can be wrong.

So, I’d say, yeah, first impressions happen super fast, in like five seconds. But it’s important to remember they’re not always right. We gotta give people a chance to show who they really are. And, of course, I try to be mindful about the impression I leave on others in those first few seconds too!

They say: You only have one chance to make the first impression.” What do you think about it?

I’ve heard that saying a lot, ‘You only have one chance to make the first impression’, and I guess there’s some truth to it. When we meet someone for the first time, whatever we think of them in those first few moments kind of sticks in our mind, right?

But, you know, I’ve been thinking about this a lot, especially after learning about the STOP concept from Quita Christonson. It’s made me realize that while first impressions are important, they’re not the end-all and be-all. Like, yeah, you can’t redo a first meeting, but people are complex, and they can surprise you.

I remember once, I met someone and thought they were really standoffish. But later, I found out they were just super nervous. And now? They’re one of my closest friends. It taught me that first impressions aren’t always accurate. People can change, or we can get a better understanding of them over time.

So, while I believe that we do make a lasting impression in the first few seconds, I also think it’s crucial to keep an open mind. People can and do change, and sometimes our initial impression can be way off. It’s all about giving people a chance and not boxing them into that first impression forever.

How much control do we have over what first impression we make on others?

I think we have a bit of control over the first impression we make, but it’s not entirely in our hands. Sure, we can decide how to dress and behave, which definitely influences how others perceive us initially. But at the same time, everyone views us through their own lens, influenced by their experiences and biases. So, even with our best efforts, how someone interprets our appearance or behavior can vary widely from what we intend.

In my experience, it’s key to be genuine. While we can’t control everything about how we’re perceived, being authentic ensures that the impression we make is a true reflection of who we are. After all, it’s not about pleasing everyone but about being true to ourselves and connecting with the right people.


part one


key language


watch the video



  • What does our brain do when you meet a new person?
  • What serves as a frame of reference when we make a first impression?
  • What happens when our first impression is wrong?
  • What does it mean “to see the other person”?

part two


key language


watch the video



  • What does the acronym STOP mean?
  • What is the advantage of the STOP approach?
  • What does Quita ask us to do when we meet a new person?

Quita Christison

The new 5 Second Rule

“Think of the respect you could give first instead of the apology later.”



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Does first impression matter?
Total Votes : 12

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